Hey, That's Not a Water Fountain!

As part of our continuing series, “You Can’t Fix Gaijin," I recently had a moment at my current placement at the Ministry of Foreign Affairs. I could tell you about what I’m doing or how it feels to balance work and a baby, but my discovery of another personal hygiene contraption is far more interesting.

After lunch the other day, I stopped for a sip of water at the water fountain.  I didn’t question why the water fountain was in the bathroom, rather than the hallway – lots of things are different here. Don’ t worry, this story isn’t that gross.

No sooner had a strange minty flavor hit my tongue than I realized that the water was an equally strange, frothy white color.  I yelped, certain I’d poisoned myself, and then noticed the English sign saying that it was a gargle fountain. Of course, the other women in the bathroom asked if I was ok and I had to explain that I didn’t know it was a gargle machine and not water. 

If you want a quick refresh, you can gargle the faintly mint liquid and spit it out in the basin. The remains will be washed away by a separate water spout. Just don't drink it and, for god's sake, don't spray it on your eyeball. I routinely wash my eyes at a water fountain, don't you?

Under the picture of the garglers, it says, "Not for drinking or  eyewash." 

I’m never at a loss for new experiences here. 

Ranchi Setto

A few visitors are coming our way in May and June, prompting me to think about recommendations. If I could give only one recommendation, it would be two simple words, lunch set. Or in Japanese, ランチセット　(ranchi setto). Whether traveling with kids, by yourself, on or not on a budget, the lunch set is the way to go in Japan.

Why? 1) It’s a complete meal, often including a drink and /or dessert, or at least the option to add those things at an insignificant cost 2) There is usually a display or photos of the available lunch sets, making it easy to choose without knowing much Japanese. A la carte menus are less likely to have displays, especially at smaller places 3) It’s a shockingly good deal. Below are a few recent lunch sets that are on the normal to small side. You can find far more elaborate lunch sets. 

840 yen for a bowl of tempura over rice, homemade soba noodles, and some tofu.

On the smaller side, 780 yen for bibimbap and miso soup.
The chopsticks are for the soup and the spoon is for the rice bowl.

I think this heavy plate of food weighed more than her.
Drink, bread bar, and dessert also included.

The lunch set is so popular that people often try out lunch first at an expensive, new restaurant before going back for dinner. Many of Tokyo’s Michelin starred restaurants offer amazing set lunches, often just smaller portions of their dinner menus at a much reduced price.

Are these filling? Absoluteley. It would be easy to make a more elaborate lunch set your main meal of the day and then enjoy an izakaya (Japanese pub), a yakitori-ya (grilled chicken and meats-on-a-stick shop), a ramen-ya (ramen shop) or other casual options for a lighter dinner. If you’re not travelling with children, the benefit of going to one of these places for an easy dinner is that the salarymen are often several beers or shochus into their evening, relaxed, and wanting to strike up conversation, or maybe even share their bottle of shochu with you. You might encounter this less in Tokyo where foreigners are more commonplace, but it’s surprising how often people do try to strike up even limited conversation with you. 

That's My Girl!

When I went to Mama and Me yoga last Wednesday, I assumed my biggest challenge would be to keep our little girl occupied. I did not anticipate continually fending off the advances of a 6-month old Lothario. They start so young nowadays….

No sooner had I laid Lindsay down on a makeshift bed and tucked her under a blanket than Lothario crawled over while my back was turned. In the time it took me to get a yoga mat 10 feet away, he had already “sauntered” up to her and was attempting to pull back the blanket. Seriously, he had the blanket in his cute, chubby hand and was pulling it back. Actually, since he’s nearly 3x her size, he looked less like Lothario and more like King Kong preparing to pluck his heart’s desire from the building.

We all had a laugh, his mother collected him and we began the class. Much to our amusement, he was bent on wooing her, approaching a second, third, fourth and finally, a fifth time. The last time, it seemed he came on all fours bearing gifts. He had rattle in his hand that banged on the floor every time his hand came down. I was watching closely to make sure he didn’t get too close with the toy and accidentally bang it on her head, but just as I was about to intercede, he dropped the toy and continued his approach. Perhaps he was mesmerized by her beauty and forgot all other earthly pleasures?

During this time, an older woman took a shine to Lothario. A 9-month old Mrs. Robinson kept trying to get his attention, even giving him her lovey at one point. Her mom stopped dead in her Warrior 2 tracks to exclaim, “She’s never given anyone her lovey before!” But poor Mrs. Robinson just didn’t seem to understand that Lothario likes the young ones. Unfortunately for Lothario, Lindsay barely seemed aware of his existence. That’s my girl!

Giri Giri Hanami

Giri giri, meaning just in time or just barely, is one of my favorite Japanese words. Unfortunately, I do most things giri giri, assuming giri giri stretches to 5 or 15 minutes delayed rather than just being called late. Fortunately, I now have a good excuse in the form of a cute little baby to cover my giri giri ways. Giri giri style, we just barely enjoyed a family outing to enjoy the blossoms before they faded.

You can never truly miss cherry blossoms in Japan since the trees are planted everywhere the concrete truck missed, but we nearly missed the experience of "hanami" or cherry blossom viewing. I've always found hanami to be one of the most festive times in Japan. It seems as if everyone collectively relaxes for the few days that sakura bloom in their town.

Everyone, I mean everyone, takes a break from normal life to enjoy hanami, which usually involves some sort of outing, usually including food and probably alcohol. It's not uncommon for offices to send a junior staffperson out in the morning to secure a good spot for the evening's party by sitting in it all day long. It's one of the few times you feel like people take an unplanned break since you can never know very far in advance exactly when the sakura will be in full bloom. This year's peak sakura in Tokyo were about 10 days earlier than average.

There are many famous hanami spots in Tokyo and we made it out to a few of them this week. Jason had a hanami walk with his NIDS colleagues one evening, while Lindsay and I made it out for a stroll along the Meguro river on Thursday and a picnic at Shinjuku Gyoen on Friday. We wanted to have a  family activity over the weekend, but the weather turned cold and rainy, canceling a nice picnic or stroll in the park. As giro giri luck would have it, I saw that a restaurant near us was running cherry blossom river cruises, called at 10:30 am about availability and learned there was a cancellation for the 11 am cruise. Somehow we managed to make it out the door and walk to the dock only minutes before the boat departed.

Enjoying a stroll along the Meguro River.

Tokyo Urban Baby hosted an outing at Shinjuku-Gyoen

Sakura appreciation from the back of a jet-ski

Hanami on the Meguro River.

The Girl From Shinagawa

I should be doing something useful like taxes or insurance claims while Lindsay Alice naps this morning, but instead I've been working on the lyrics to her theme song. Set to the tune of The Girl from Ipanema.

Small and sweet and young and hungry

The girl from Shinagawa was fussy

And when she fusses, each cry it sounds just like, “WAH!”

When she cries, it’s like a banshee

It sounds so loud, it makes you crazee

And when she stops, her parents, they sigh “Thank God!”

Oh, though we tell her we love her

And that we never would leave her
No, it isn't her diaper

Still each day, starting at 6

She cries all the night til she quits

Small and sweet and young and hungry

The girl from Shinagawa was fussy

And when she fusses, we try, but she just doesn’t quit

She never will quit

Previously unpublished photos from her time at the Red Cross Hospital (courtesy of our friend Colin). No babies were harmed in the taking of these pictures.

Japanese Lessons

I've started collecting Japanese phrases and idioms related to babies and parenthood.

目に入れても痛くな胃(Me ni irete mo itakunai): Even if I put you in my eye, it doesn't hurt. More generally translated as the apple of my eye

イクメン (Ikumen): This combines the Japanese verb for raising a child and the English word for men.  It's a new word to describe not just stay at home dads, but more generally, modern men who are more involved in raising children. 

A real ikumen's ikumen.

おなかを痛め子(Onaka o itame ko): The child who made my belly hurt. Keep in mind the epidural rate in Japan is only about 3%.  

小さ生んで、大きく育つ(Chisaku unde, ookiku sodatsu): Born small, raise big. Alot of women get pressured not to gain too much weight during pregnancy. I assume this phrase is also related to the low epidural rate, where it's easier to have a natural delivery with a 6-7 pounder than with a heftier baby.

子は鎹(Ko ha kasugai): The child is the bond between parents.

一姫二太郎(Ichi hime ni tarou): Generally translated as "it's good to have a girl first and then a boy." Someone else suggested, "It's good to practice with a girl first, then have a boy." Somehow, I suspect the second translation is closer to the true meaning.

鳶が鷹を生む(Tonbi ga taka o umu): The black kite (a common bird?) can give birth to a hawk, or even plain parents can give birth to a genius child.

蛙の子は蛙 (Kaeru no ko ha kaeru): Literally, the frog's child is the frog, meaning like father, like son, or the apple does not fall far from the tree.

If she's the frog's child, who's the frog?

And finally:

親ばか (Oya baka): Literally, "parent stupid," referring to overly fond parents who believe that their child is the cutest, best child in the world. Lindsay is obviously the cutest, best child in the world and there's nothing oya baka about it.

How Lindsay Alice picked her own name

Madeleine, Abigail, Anna, Vivian, Christina, Daphne. What do these names have in common? None of them are Lindsay. I've forgotten the few dozen names we bandied about before she picked her own name, but Lindsay was not on the list.

Last fall, we had a wonderful weekend in Gunma prefecture. We went up with a friend and met a Japanese family who had arranged a night's lodging at a traditional ryokan in Kusatsu, a famous onsen town. It was a perfect weekend with good company, delicious food, and lots of relaxation. And there were trees!  I miss trees living in Tokyo.

A pre-dinner stroll through town after our bath.

The first half of our kaiseki dinner.

On Sunday, as we drove through Nagano to catch the train back to Tokyo, I was in a half-dozy, very happy state with the fall sun streaming through the windows, lost in thought about the last time I had been in the area. I had enjoyed many ski trips with friends, including to Nagano, when I previously lived in Japan. For some reason, my sleepy thoughts settled on an acquaintance named Lindsay. Although I liked Lindsay, we weren't close friends, but she was foremost in my mind for some reason. Jason, lost in his own thoughts about skiing, turned to me at that exact moment and asked "What about Lindsay?" Lindsey Vonn is a famous skier.

Enjoying a perfect fall day in Nagano.

I snapped out of my reverie, my jaw dropped and I momentarily suspected that Jason might have supernatural powers. We didn't completely settle on the name Lindsay that day (or the spelling), but I maintain that Lindsay settled on it for us.

As for Alice?  We originally considered Lindsay Ann, but in mid-December I came home from work and asked, "What do you think about Alice?" Jason said he had always liked that name, had just downloaded Alice in Wonderland, and was also going to suggest it. And that's how Lindsay Alice picked her own name.

Future Olympic Skier?